Saturday, January 1, 2011

A New Year A new......

Music: "Debussy"  "Clair De Lune"

HAPPY NEW YEAR!! it's been a little over a week sense I've written you, I'm sorry for that but I just couldn't figure out what to say? So I'll do my best not to ramble....I always have things to say and subjects to write about but couldn't pick between the two that were floating around in my head so I decided just now that I would write about both. Now if I could only remember the second topic Haha (I'm having one of those days) Lately I've been having more and more trouble with the idea of love....Truly I've had half and half of what love gives, never one long sense of the "Lasting love" you hear about (Other then the love I think god and my parents have given me) and I get scared like I'm sure most do, that it won't ever show up or if it dose then something awful will go happen. (I know it won't if I don't let it) but for right now I can't seem to shake the feeling of hate when I see another couple holding hands, Making plans, etc... (BITTER party of one) it's a good thing I didn't write to you yesterday...Goodness! My friend and I were just awful ha! She's had a boy or two already but yet one of the things I love about her is she'll never be goo goo ga ga over some people or a guy unless it calls for it. I'm not saying the entire world is that way but around the holidays or in the summer time if you don't have someone even a friend to share them with is sometimes unbearable! It would have been alright if I'd had an old friend of mine with me but sadly I don't. I can't seem to remember my other topic so that's another thing I'll write about: "Finding friends" Having a disability is also rough cause if your like me you don't really get out much to meet new people. So when you end up losing or just not staying in touch with a friend (And your SUPER sensitive) it can be quite the blow. Yes, you have a cell phone, Computer, etc but not always a car to see those friends, and your friends don't always know quite what to do with you when you do go out. And if you have younger public school friends like me they can't drive and most of the time are in school or getting ready to start collage. I'm not saying I want like a hundred friends but meeting new people is such a big deal for those who can't. On the bright side though I have the most WONDERFUL friends! Friendship means everything to me, when I meet someone and we just click that's it! Your with me for life haha!! Well, I'm just about out of crazy things to say. Sorry if this makes no sense what so ever....Take with it what you will my darling bloggers :)

"To have a broken heart means you have tried" -Eat, Pray, Love The Movie.
Keep Reading,
Jess.

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