Sunday, September 22, 2013

Slow Going....

Music: "Brick by brick" Katy Perry (Unplugged)

I feel as though someone could walk right through me and I wouldn't even care. I feel so empty. it's no secret that woman deal with a lot when it comes to our emotions we always feel overwhelmed and out of sorts almost, especially around that time of the month (Why do you think we get so pissed at you boy's who ask us if "it's that time?" because you don't have to go through this shit! anyway, combined with that and life and depression to top it all off I become more withdrawn then I already am. I never know when or if it stopped when it hits me like a punch to the gut...."All my little white lies smell like a big 'ol bucket of bleach" a lyric that seems fitting to how I feel right now, I feel as though anything I say is not worth the breath. I want to feel the cold wet rain on my face and know that I'm still here and not in some other realm where everyone just moves slowly never getting anywhere, never feeling. It's almost like someone is pushing me back, making me sleep all day knowing that when I wake up I'll want to see what awaits, only to hold me back while I kick and thrash to get to the rain.

Tonight I will dream of rain.

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