Monday, July 21, 2014

No sleep till....?

Music: "Waiting for superman" Daughtry

Evening folks, lets see...I've just been turned down for the umpteenth time by a guy I could finally see something with other then my ex. He deals with depression which is one of the reasons I could see something with him, it caught up with him for the first time in a long time over the past few days, I feel so awful for him, I really do. But I don't have any choice but to leave if you push away, I can't risk that again for myself. I have to find who want's to help me and vice vrsa. Then talking with a new online friend of mine this evening who lost someone, I feel so much of the pain she feels as well, I know it's not much, but knowing I'll never really know my twin sister (See old posts) never fails to hit home when I hear someone's going through that kind of a loss, it's my biggest loss of my life. There are just times I just want to know her and wonder if she and I would have really understood each other.....Again, I'm just saying what's on my mind, but I'm really wondering why the hell I'm not enough right now? I hear all the time how I'm nice, funny, etc....but why do these guys I talk with, my ex included not see that too? I mean it's not like I think I'm the best thing ever, but I do know I'm worth something.....My point is I guess, we're just dealing right now, and I'm the last to say this, but pain can be good sometimes ladies and gentleman.

Keep Reading,
Jess. 

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